This is a bit of an odd title, I will give you this much.
“People who always blame others are empty inside”, what could I mean by that?
Oddly enough, I was being pretty darn specific.
All of us have a tendency to shift the blame whenever we can. We were taught by society to behave that way, why are they blaming us for lying?
Truth is, people don’t like failures. We tend to dislike getting punished for them even more than that.
If you mess up at work, you will get yelled at. If you drop something, it’s up to you to have it fixed. Taking responsibility sucks, doesn’t it?
Some people might not agree, but they are mostly faking it. Those people like the control that comes alongside responsibility.
There has to be a reason for everything, but surely it shouldn’t have anything to do with us, right? I sure as heck know that I hate being blamed for things, whether or not I did them or not.
Shifting the blame onto someone else is really easy in some cases, so we tend to do it effortlessly.
Yet that is just an excuse, a way for us to justify our failures. In such an unforgiving world why might think that playing the blame game is a practical solution, and to some level it is, yet it only ends up hurting us in the long run.
Here’s the thing, blaming others automatically is a result of a habit.
It shapes our very mind from its very core, creating a certain mindset that drags us back rather than pushing us forward.
Hence, why people who always blame others are empty inside.
Don’t believe me? Fair enough, I haven’t given you any reason to!
But I will, right now. So here’s why people who always blame others are empty inside.
It prevents action.
I don’t mean that in a literal sense, mind you.
It’s just that when you blame someone else for a certain issue you end up getting nowhere.
Sure, they might be responsible, but that really doesn’t matter.
The fact is, there’s an issue that needs to be fixed and pointing at someone else while yelling “aha!” isn’t going to solve anything.
The blame-game tends to replace action, you just shift the blame to someone else and assume that you are free of taking action yourself.
Some time ago I bumped into my boss during an inspection. As it turns out, she was carrying a rather fragile vase of all things.
Yeah, I know, pretty cliche, but stuff like this happens in real life too.
Either way, she spent about five minutes arguing with me, and then she told me to clean this mess up.
I grit my teeth.
It doesn’t matter who is responsible, we had an inspection and we all needed to be ready, if she just helped me we would have been done with all the broken glass that much sooner.
But she didn’t, because I was at fault here, or so she thought.
Because of that delay, I was too slow in finishing all of my tasks, something which actually leads to a penalty in our report.
Believe it or not, she had me fired because of that incident.
In the end, our need to justify ourselves does not override our need to take action. Even if someone else is at fault, that one fact doesn’t change all other relevant circumstances.
When there are things to be done, prioritizing responsibility and blame of all things is nothing but damaging.
Be helpful, don’t be resentful.
It’s a negative mindset to have
The law of attraction states that positive thoughts lead to positive experiences.
As you might have figured out, I am not a huge fan of that law – I believe that positive experiences lead to positive thought, no the other way around.
Yet the mentality is the same in essence, as such, I would love to point out to you being extremely negative.
When looking for someone to blame, you are trying to pinpoint an issue by default.
You aren’t looking on the bright side of things, you are just looking for how to twist your way out of a situation, and you will put up any excuse to achieve that outcome.
Yeah, I did say excuse, but more on that later.
For now, think about it this way – why are you being such a jerk?
Seriously, that’s the difference between helping a person get up after you bumped into each other and starting to rant at them.
It might not seem like much, but that’s a toxic mindset to have. You will end up overly defensive and unapproachable. People will hate you and you won’t get it.
Why are they being such jerks?
Well, that’s why!
It’s a lie
It isn’t just about being negative or avoiding action, it’s also about coming up with excuses to justify yourself, even when push comes to shove and you find yourself unable to act.
Why? Because you don’t want to act upon the situation, you feel as if taking actions would be like admitting to being at fault.
The thing is when you shift the blame to someone else you are doing nothing short of coming up with excuses. Sure, this isn’t the case at times, but the “excuses mindset” won’t do you any good.
You will see how it comes up in other situations in your life. Whenever you are faced with a shortcoming you will find yourself using an excuse.
Very soon people will start losing respect for you.
This isn’t about action either, the simple action of acknowledging your failures earns you a level of trust that you really couldn’t do well without.
Just saying “yes I am at fault” can go a pretty long way, believe it or not.
It builds up, like compound interest, which leads us to a mindset-changing action that you may take…
It takes your power away from you
Shifting the blame to someone else is an action with greater re-precautions than you were lead to believe.
When you say that someone else is at fault you give up all of the power you might have had over the situation. When other people are at fault it implies that you couldn’t have done anything to correct the situation.
Whether or not you are consciously aware of it, this is what you are admitting to yourself. You turn yourself into the victim, the one who needs help.
Repercussions will come, mind you. You will start feeling inferior at the price of your own guilt. The funny thing is that inferiority complexes tend to develop into flat-out guilt-trips because your brain tries to find fault within itself to justify the way that you are feeling.
Instead, you should actively search for a way to blame yourself. Sure, responsibility sucks, but you will find yourself empowered by the experience.
By finding out what you could have done differently you leave the power in your own hands, all the while creating a mindset that is based on action rather than meaningless arguments.
I already covered how important a mindset is for overcoming these issues, so I won’t repeat myself again.
Final thoughts and conclusions
People who always blame others are empty inside.
I said it at the beginning of my article, back when I mentioned my odd choice for a title.
I told you that I would explain myself after saying something like that, and I have.
As such, I think that I’ve based my entire argument rather well.
If you actively choose to agree with me and change your mindset…
Well, I’ve already provided all the actions you should be taking, although I didn’t mention any of them explicitly.
So in case you’ve missed it, here’s a quick run-through over the main takeaway from this article.
- Don’t blame others, blame yourself.
- Don’t make up excuses
- take action to change the situation
- Do your best
When it really boils down to it the issue at hand is more complicated than that.
As I have mentioned in my article about habits, it takes time to change your mindset, even with the right habits.
Still, if you put in the effort, you can overcome this problem fully.
So here’s a quick question – do you tend to blame others? What about lying to get away from bad situations at the expense of others?
More than one question, but I would still love to hear from you so make sure to write your answer in the comment section below.
I read through every single one of them.
If you got something personal you would like to ask me then make sure to send an email.
I am never too busy to deal with any of my readers, and I would always love to hear more from you!